Step Out of the Story, Open the Door to Inner Guidance

The other week I was out hiking some spectacularly beautiful trails that traveled up and down verdant hills speckled with wildflowers. It was hot and I kept stopping on the uphill stretches to rest. It seemed like I was out of shape, I got tired more easily than I normally would. This gorgeous hike was starting to feel like a chore. I noticed that I was pushing myself physically to get up the hills.

Then I stepped out of my mental story of “Oh, it’s so hot. What’s wrong with me? This trail is longer than I thought,” to receive a sudden realization that if I got totally present and accepting of the pace my body really wanted to go at in this moment, then I would be experiencing ease, which is how I want to live my life anyway. So I started taking very small steps on the hills, and used the time to breathe and appreciate. I approached one particularly daunting slope and was amazed that this time, even after having hiked five miles, I made it to the top with ease and without stopping.

You may have heard it said that the world is a hologram, which means, on a personal level, how you approach one area of your life affects all the other areas of your life. Our thoughts are powerful creators. Once you get into a groove of not liking something, however justified you feel that is, your experience gets significantly harder. Slow down to find a way to be with what is, appreciate what you can appreciate, and the peace you find will nourish your soul.

We’ve been exploring the power of stepping out of your story in my Clarity, Inner Freedom and Next Steps class. Once you step out of your story and become intentional, you activate your inner guidance, which just loves to help you achieve your dreams and live with greater happiness and fulfillment.

© 2010 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life

Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, inner vibrancy coach, teaches Deep Listening Skills™, a simple focusing process you can use to get clear, unstuck, find happiness and next steps personally or professionally. She offers Inner Guidance Coaching Programs™ and a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.

Inner Guidance Can Be Subtle and Quick

How many times has something happened out of the blue that didn’t surprise you? In fact, the surprise is that, on an almost subconscious level, you already knew what was going to happen. I say almost subconscious, because you probably received a flash thought, feeling or image but it went by so fast you didn’t fully register it. I’ve experienced this phenomenon of already knowing, yet not knowing—knowing on a subtle level, so many times—like when a meeting gets cancelled or postponed, a job ends, or something comes up in a relationship. You can have the same sense of knowing when something uplifting suddenly happens—you might say, “I knew something good was going to happen today—I could feel it in my bones.”

Often we don’t fully receive our inner guidance because we are moving so fast, our minds preoccupied with so much at one time. We aren’t always present with ourselves or each other, so it’s hard to be open enough to hear inner guidance. Some of the greatest joys in life flourish when you slow down. Even in the course of a busy day, it’s wonderful to take the time to do simple things like listen to the birds, admire a flower or press soft pungent pine or cypress needles between your fingers and sniff their fresh scent.

A couple of weeks ago, I went for a hike that climbed uphill through woods to a beautiful meadow, overlooking a magnificent vista of several mountain ranges. I sat and meditated for a while, feeling the peace of letting go of everything I’d been holding on to in the last few weeks. As I got up to go, I walked towards the path I needed to take to return, yet turned around to look at another path that went further up the hill. Although I needed to be mindful of the time, I felt drawn to retrace my steps and just explore the uphill path. There was something about the light on the gorse bushes and the emerald green grass that beckoned me.

I walked up a short way and came to another meadow that I didn’t know was there. Then when I turned back, I suddenly saw a rabbit. It was a small white cottontail bunny. I was thrilled because I adore seeing bunnies in the wild. I stood and watched it for a while, then started to creep one step at a time closer to see it even better. It stayed quivering and listening and then finally fled, its white cottontail disappearing into the bushes. I walked a few more steps along the path and saw two more rabbits, much closer to me than the previous one. I stayed watching until they became aware of me and darted into the long grass. As I turned the corner, I saw three more. I was in rabbit heaven. It’s very rare to see cottontail rabbits in the Bay Area and yet I’ve always loved seeing lots of rabbits pop in and out of the grass in the fields in England. I was so pleased that I had followed my urge to explore the path in the opposite direction from which I was headed. I was thrilled with my unexpected gift.

Take some time each day to slow down and let your inner guidance catch up with you. You’ll be surprised how much you’ll notice, realize and be gifted with.

© 2010 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life

Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, inner vibrancy coach, teaches Deep Listening Skills™, a simple focusing process you can use to get clear, unstuck and find your next steps personally or professionally. She offers Inner Guidance Coaching Programs™ and a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.

Creating Space for Inner Freedom

I was noticing an underlying tension the other day as I faced the unknown in many aspects of my life. Of course, this is what we’re doing all along—living with the unknown. If you think anything otherwise, you’re really just fooling yourself, though sometimes it’s nice to believe in a set of neat containers once you feel you’ve got your ducks all lined up in a row. Most people I know have some pretty unruly ducks, so maybe it’s not so much about the ducks but more about how you feel inside no matter what your ducks are doing.

I think it’s incredibly brave to follow your heart and keep appreciating the rich and incredibly varied beauty of life, not knowing for sure how anything will truly turn out or when the rug will be swept away from under your feet. It seems that by choosing courage over fear, in daily small choices as well as the big decisions, we get to know the sweetness of life. That those of us who know life as bliss, in spite of life’s harsh realities, discover our bliss through an open and courageous heart.

So simply by being courageous and opening your heart, you experience a taste of inner freedom. Then it’s up to you to fine-tune your awareness, so that you catch yourself when you’ve drifted away from that sense of openness. Notice when you start to close up inside, when your energy is less vibrant, when your thoughts start to send you on a downward spiral.

Here is something simple you can do to create more space inside yourself again, more room for inner freedom:

Stop what you’re doing and become very still.

B R E A T H E

Notice the space all around you, particularly around your upper chest where your heart is.

Let go of everything, all thoughts, concerns and desires to simply be present with the energy in this space around you, and inside you. Listen to the energy, notice how it feels, how it looks. Give thanks for being alive, without anything needing to look a certain way. Open your heart to your life force, to the miracle of life.

You may notice that you breathe a sigh of relief. This is a good sign. In your deepest knowing, you recognize that you’ve come home again. You’ve come home to the simplicity of pure Being, without the need to drag around a cart full of attachment to outcomes. The freedom you feel in letting go of your agendas and concerns is a sign that inner freedom is good for life.

Get curious. How much can you let go and still be intentional? How yummy and spacious can you be? This is my personal exploration and if you like the sound of it, try it on. Life gets juicy when step out on inner and outer adventures.

© 2010 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life

Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, inner vibrancy coach, teaches Deep Listening Skills™, a simple focusing process you can use whenever you feel unclear, disconnected from your inner vibrancy, or feel stuck personally or professionally. She offers Inner Guidance Coaching Programs™ and a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.

How to Keep Finding Your Way Back to Your Inner Vibrancy

How do you cope with circumstances in your life looking so different from how you want them to be? Feelings about your current situation, whether it’s not having the money you need, difficulties in your relationships, being without a job or a home can be especially poignant at this time of the year, but of course, the phenomenon of life not looking how you want it to happens all year round.

The great gem I want to share with you is that your inner joy, that vibrant spark of life that you love to feel, your inner vibrancy, is always available to you. Your inner vibrancy is not dependent on your life looking a certain way. Even if your life seems to be crumbling down in ruins around your feet, you can still feel your radiant heart.

The mind has a hard time with the concept of joy without cause. Even if you did feel peaceful and happy for a few blessed moments, your mind would quickly remind you that your relationship sucks or that you don’t have any work. The mind likes to find its way back to the problem and keep tilling the soil looking for answers. It’s almost like a need to look like we’re taking our problems seriously and not going skiving off to have fun at the beach.

Do not get tempted to follow your mind’s impulse to wallow in the misery of your circumstances. Instead, choose to seek out the warm glow of your inner vibrancy that shines a light to guide you to shelter from the storm. At first your inner vibrancy may seem like a dimly remembered concept, a warm glow that belongs to another season, another part of the world. Yet if you set your heart on finding your way back to your inner vibrancy, no matter what is going on in your life, then you will once again bask in its tender light.

You may have to first of all scream with impatience, stamp your feet or ball your eyes out. The path to freedom is through your emotions rather than sitting on your emotions, pretending that they aren’t there, while they seep into your veins and rot your pleasure. The secret is to let go of the story about the way your life looks, about how you wish it were different, about how fed up you are and so the list goes on. Let the emotion move through you like a quick shower or brief thunderstorm, then let the sunshine in. Open the doors and windows to life not looking like it necessarily seems.

Your inner vibrancy will meet you where you land. Once you’ve got over the desire to make your situation different, to fix what’s wrong and control your life to move in a certain direction, you’ll just let go and come to peace with the moment, whatever it looks like. When you feel at peace, you can connect with your inner guidance and know the actions you need to take.

There’s nothing wrong in losing your joy and having to find your way back—it happens to the best of us. But, when you don’t find your way back to your joy, when you forget that you have a source of inner vibrancy, when you settle for a dismal story that depletes you of your life force and you think that that is all there is, then you have a call to action. A wake-up call for change. Because who wants to spend their life chasing illusions? Let’s build our dreams instead!

© 2009 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life

Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, inner vibrancy coach, teaches Deep Listening Skills™, a simple focusing process you can use whenever you feel unclear, disconnected from your inner vibrancy, or feel stuck personally or professionally. She offers Inner Guidance Coaching Programs™ and a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.

Treasure Your Inner Vibrancy

I’ve been looking for a word that sums up how I feel when I’ve moved through an inner block or painful perception, and once again feel a lightness of heart and a spring in my step. Finally, when writing the other day the word vibrancy arose in my consciousness. For some reason, I’ve never used that word. Yet, when I feel truly alive and thrilled about life, and often for no particular reason, just pure joie de vie – much better than eau de vie – I am filled with an inner vibrancy. Inner vibrancy makes my heart sing. It’s the reason why I have remained dedicated to Deep Listening Skills™—because whenever I do the Deep Listening Skills™, I come through the pain or fog and reunite with my full energy and vibrancy.

We all have inner vibrancy. It’s who we truly are. Yet many times, inner vibrancy gets lost amidst all the practical concerns, worries, fears and multiple demands of life. The only way to experience a more vibrant reality is to treasure your inner vibrancy. Your inner vibrancy is your spirit, your soul, the joy that soars just because you are alive and in love with life. Make inner vibrancy your priority, and you invite joy and fullness into your life.

One way to fan the flames of your inner vibrancy is to go on an appreciation walk. Just step outside. Walk around the block, your garden, your neighborhood. Let go of all thoughts and preoccupations. Simply be present to your direct experience. Notice the trees, look up, right to their tops as they grace the skyline. If you’re living in a climate where the flowers are out, enjoy their vibrant colors, the shapes their petals make, and bend down to sniff a rose – they don’t all smell nowadays, but if you strike lucky you can luxuriate in wafts of perfume. When I breathe in the scent of a rose, my nose pressed against its inner swirl of soft petals, there’s no way I think about something else at the same time.

Take deep breaths as you walk and let go into the moment. Pretty soon, you’ll start to feel the warm glow of your heart, the relief of returning to simplicity, to appreciating the gifts of this world that you don’t have to pay for. I remember years ago, when I was going through some depression and a friend said, “don’t think about all the big things right now (what I was going to do with my life), just enjoy the small things.” She was so right.

When you become present with everyday simple things, with appreciation, you return to your center. Your energy starts to build up and you open the door to your inner vibrancy. This might show up as flickerings of peace in your heart. Gentle, subtle and silent. Or, waves of inner vibrancy that soar through your being, bubbling up in laughter, inspired ideas and a big, wide open heart.

Your inner vibrancy needs to be alive in you to show you the way and help you through the day. Inner vibrancy fuels your inner guidance. So when you get in a funk, although it’s tempting to wallow in the funk and feel like your inner vibrancy is about as accessible as swimming in the sea in the middle of winter, it’s best to focus on reconnecting with your inner vibrancy.

More about reconnecting with your inner vibrancy in next week’s post.

And here's a beautiful, short video that a friend sent to me - perfect for this time of year - or any time of year - to get you into the inner vibrancy frame of mind.
http://www.youtube.com/gratefulness

© 2009 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life

Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, inner vibrancy coach, teaches Deep Listening Skills™, a simple focusing process you can use whenever you feel unclear, disconnected from your inner vibrancy, or feel stuck personally or professionally. She offers Inner Guidance Coaching Programs™ and a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.

The Twirling Leaf or Staying Alert for Subtle Messages

Just recently I was feeling a little down. Things had been slow financially the last few weeks and I was feeling the “pinch”. Then one day I was in Santa Cruz and went for a walk in my beloved Pogonip. I love walking in Pogonip. There’s such a sweet energy there and a varied landscape of hills, views, woods, redwoods, meadows and a creek. I had just been sitting in my favorite meadow to meditate and was feeling at peace on rising. I followed the path into the woods and was suddenly struck by a slender, solitary yellow leaf twirling in the distance. I walked right up to it and found myself in a circle of redwoods. The air was still. All other foliage motionless. Yet this one leaf that was actually attached to a dead branch by a thread of cobweb was twirling around like a whirling dervish.

I stood entranced. My mind wasn’t particularly interested in trying to work out why this one leaf, and not even another next to it caught in the cobweb, was moving. What captivated me was an intense feeling of being spoken to. I was receiving a subtle reminder that activity was happening behind the scenes, that I was very much a part of the entire movement of the Universe, that I was not disengaged, out on a limb or forgotten. My sense of communication with this solitary twirling leaf was so intense that I asked it, or whatever was moving it to twirl in the other direction. The leaf slowed down, bounced from side to side and then promptly swung round to now spin in the opposite direction.

My heart flooded with gratitude for this magical interaction. I felt my world open up into something so much more vast and meaningful. As I continued along my path I felt cleansed of all previous concerns and awash in the calming beauty of the dark trickling creek, the tawny fir needles and the graceful, nurturing trees.

The following day a new client called and a former client the day after that. Money was flowing in once again and the feeling of peace, gratitude and connection to the great All That Is hasn’t left me for a second. It’s hard when facing the unknown and the challenges of being in transition to maintain this vibrant sense of trust, peace and wellbeing.

We are more receptive to subtle messages when we become quiet, open and present. Make some room for time to be still and appreciative, so you can respond to the support of your inner guidance. Subtle messages visit us in many different ways; kind words, a rush of gratitude for someone or something you were taking for granted, a phrase that you read that fills you with its meaning, a sudden change of attitude, the landing of a ladybug on your hand wishing you good luck. The power of the message lies in how fully you receive it, how completely it can transform you into an expansive state where you readily believe that the absolute highest outcome is being created right in this very moment.

© 2009 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life

Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, transitions coach, helps people who are feeling stuck, unclear or distracted achieve their most cherished goals with her 21-Day Inner Guidance Coaching Program. She offers a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.

Fast is Not Always Best

Just recently I was driving to a meetup group on social media in Milpitas trying to shorten my journey by 10 minutes despite the fact that it was rush hour traffic. My aim was to get there as fast as I could without getting a speeding ticket. At the same time, I kept taking some deep breaths to stay calm and relaxed. I’d never been to the group before, but had the address and directions from mapquest. Then I noticed that I needed gas. I’d forgotten about that. “Oh well, I’ll just take it all in my stride.” I stopped for gas en route. I was doing pretty well surrendering to the flow as I mixed in with the traffic on the freeway.

The closer I got to the restaurant where we were to meet, the more jammed up the traffic became. Finally I spotted the restaurant, Marie Callenders, on the other side of the intersection of two freeways. I exited the freeway and tried to judge what road I would take to enter the restaurant, which was coming right up. I glimpsed a road on the right and I turned quickly into it only to land up on the freeway heading off in the opposite direction! Now I was getting tense. I got off at the next exit, crossed the freeway and drove back towards the exit where the restaurant was. This time I carefully drove past the entrance onto the freeway and looked out for the next street to the right. I passed the restaurant, with no turning to the right to be seen. The next building was Denny’s. Ah, they’re probably all in the same lot, I thought. I drove into the Denny’s parking lot. There was a wall between Denny’s and the Marie Callenders parking lot.

I turned around, drove out, waiting about 4 minutes to merge with the traffic, and finally I come to the next intersection which I recognized as the street name I had scrawled on a scrap of paper. I followed the road to the right going all the way down its winding route to arrive at the back of Marie Callenders. I sat still for a while in my car gathering my center from the frenzied whirlwind of activity. I marveled at how easy it is to act faster than is truly needed. In my haste, I had forgotten that I had the street address for the restaurant and yet I had tried to seemingly drive through walls and decide for myself what street the restaurant should be on.

If there had been a tortoise in this story, it would have been sitting at the table in Marie Callenders waiting to greet me. In our action-crammed lives, it’s easy to forget just how much we have to slow down for our inner wisdom to catch up with us. Often a simple event like this is a reflection of what happens in other areas of life. I remember how, when I take a journey step by step instead of trying to leap ahead of myself, that I am buoyantly supported by the flow, the current of wisdom that is ever present to us all, that leads me just where I need to be—in perfect timing.