How do you cope with circumstances in your life looking so different from how you want them to be? Feelings about your current situation, whether it’s not having the money you need, difficulties in your relationships, being without a job or a home can be especially poignant at this time of the year, but of course, the phenomenon of life not looking how you want it to happens all year round.
The great gem I want to share with you is that your inner joy, that vibrant spark of life that you love to feel, your inner vibrancy, is always available to you. Your inner vibrancy is not dependent on your life looking a certain way. Even if your life seems to be crumbling down in ruins around your feet, you can still feel your radiant heart.
The mind has a hard time with the concept of joy without cause. Even if you did feel peaceful and happy for a few blessed moments, your mind would quickly remind you that your relationship sucks or that you don’t have any work. The mind likes to find its way back to the problem and keep tilling the soil looking for answers. It’s almost like a need to look like we’re taking our problems seriously and not going skiving off to have fun at the beach.
Do not get tempted to follow your mind’s impulse to wallow in the misery of your circumstances. Instead, choose to seek out the warm glow of your inner vibrancy that shines a light to guide you to shelter from the storm. At first your inner vibrancy may seem like a dimly remembered concept, a warm glow that belongs to another season, another part of the world. Yet if you set your heart on finding your way back to your inner vibrancy, no matter what is going on in your life, then you will once again bask in its tender light.
You may have to first of all scream with impatience, stamp your feet or ball your eyes out. The path to freedom is through your emotions rather than sitting on your emotions, pretending that they aren’t there, while they seep into your veins and rot your pleasure. The secret is to let go of the story about the way your life looks, about how you wish it were different, about how fed up you are and so the list goes on. Let the emotion move through you like a quick shower or brief thunderstorm, then let the sunshine in. Open the doors and windows to life not looking like it necessarily seems.
Your inner vibrancy will meet you where you land. Once you’ve got over the desire to make your situation different, to fix what’s wrong and control your life to move in a certain direction, you’ll just let go and come to peace with the moment, whatever it looks like. When you feel at peace, you can connect with your inner guidance and know the actions you need to take.
There’s nothing wrong in losing your joy and having to find your way back—it happens to the best of us. But, when you don’t find your way back to your joy, when you forget that you have a source of inner vibrancy, when you settle for a dismal story that depletes you of your life force and you think that that is all there is, then you have a call to action. A wake-up call for change. Because who wants to spend their life chasing illusions? Let’s build our dreams instead!
© 2009 Nicola Walker, Clarity for Life
Want to use this article in your own newsletter or website? You can as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Nicola Walker, inner vibrancy coach, teaches Deep Listening Skills™, a simple focusing process you can use whenever you feel unclear, disconnected from your inner vibrancy, or feel stuck personally or professionally. She offers Inner Guidance Coaching Programs™ and a free half hour phone coaching consultation. Visit her website, http://www.clarityforlife.com to find out more.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
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